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Danger, hunger, terror, coldness, fear – these are not just words; they describe the reality of someone less fortunate than others. They describe Hyeonseo Lee’s life, today a North Korean defector, and her journey of escaping the country. One day in 2013, the world has learned her name and the truth about life in North Korea.

Standing on the stage in front of hundreds of people in the State of California, she nervously but bravely presented the book “The Girl With Seven Names” and for the first time, opened a little window into the real world of North Korea and her personal experience in it. Why seven names? On the very first page of the book, she introduces each name as an individual character, and each name signifies a change in Lee’s life. “When I was little, I thought my country was the best on the planet,” she told the audience. “And I grew up singing a song called ‘Nothing to Envy’ and I was very proud.”

North Korea is a caste-based country, and Lee’s mother was among the lucky ones who belonged to Songbun, the caste system classified as loyal. The girl later found out that she had privileges living in one of the few loyal caste systems in the country. The childhood she had wasn’t the best, but it was a happy one. Whoever has heard Hyeonseo Lee’s story finds it hard to believe that she loves her homeland and still misses it. 

Although I often wondered about the outside world, I thought I would spend my entire life in North Korea until everything suddenly changed.

North Korea borders China, and North Korean refugees are not met in China with open arms, quite the opposite. The battle escapees have to fight settling outside North Korea sometimes becomes so unbearable that they give up. “Even for those who have suffered unimaginably there and have escaped hell, life in the free world can be so challenging that many struggle to come to terms with it and find happiness,” the author wrote in her book. “A small number of them even give up and return to live in that dark place, as I was tempted to do, many times.”

How does one flee from North Korea? Such decisions are not made overnight. First, as a little girl, she saw people being publicly hung, kids starving, parents never talking about politics, people being arrested for having foreign goods, everyone being suspicious of each other, and so many other things that seemed normal to Hyeonseo. She simply believed everything she was told by her teachers in the kindergarten, every heroic story they fed the kids. Little Hyeonseo wholeheartedly believed that “Kim Il-sung created everything in our country. Nothing existed before him.” She knew no other truth. What was outside of this country? Or even what’s across the river where they lived nearby? And the questions began to pop up in a greedy girl’s mind as she started growing up. 

Later in her teens, Hyeonseo saw famine for the first time. She saw a woman with her two-year-old son being pale and bone-dry. Not only that, but the country was starving to death, and even worse – cannibalism. And she wondered, “Isn’t North Korea the greatest nation on earth?”

Hyeonseo’s long journey started with visiting relatives in China. She wanted to see China before starting college but didn’t know that it would be a visit that lasted for ten years. Hyeonseo’s uncle told her stories that started shattering her whole world. She heard North Korea being criticized for the first time in her life.

Hyeonseo Lee

After a month of living a Shenyang life, she received a call. Her family was in trouble, the authorities were looking for her, and she could not go back home. She couldn’t go back home, nor stay with her uncle and aunt – Hyeonseo got caught in a wedding trap, and that’s not the life she wanted. She had to escape.

And there she was – all alone in one of the biggest cities in China with no one by her side and with little money on her hands. A little naive but strong and persistent, she had to find her way in a new country where her origin wasn’t welcomed. Nothing seemed to be easy there – all the dangers were just right around the corner. Her heart would leap into her mouth when there was a risk of her being exposed. She became paranoid and one day, the police came after her. If only there were enough words to describe the emotional ride she was going through in a car with those policemen. Hyeonseo didn’t think about what could happen to her, but what could happen to her mother and brother. At her interrogation, she was calm and confident. Her made-up story about her family origin and excellent mastering of the Chinese saved her this time. But what did she feel?

As I walked, my relief began turning into depression. I was already hiding beneath so many lies that I hardly knew who I was anymore. I was becoming a non-person.

For all the years Hyeonseo lived in China, the only thing she dreamed about was reuniting with her family, and she needed a plan and some connections to make it happen. Even if her plan of reuniting could fall through, she wanted to let them know that she was alive. She was desperately looking for brokers who could help her to get her family out of North Korea, but it was the sums she couldn’t possibly afford.

Hyeonseo knew she needed an ID to get her life on the right path and with that document, she could feel that she actually exists. This ID card was her lucky ticket into the corporate world in China; she got a job as an interpreter and secretary at a South Korean tech company. Hyeonseo could finally feel legal, yet people from her previous life would come back and steer her heart with fear. “Wherever I go, even in a country as big as this, the truth will catch up with me.”

Everything that happened in Hyeonseo’s life after that was full of the fear of being caught, recognized, or reported by someone, taken as a prisoner by a gang or being attacked by a stranger. All of this had happened in her life, yet nothing stopped her from following her own path. Her love for family moved her like some invisible, irresistible force. And love once again took over when she fell in love and moved to South Korea. And that’s when she told her truth – North Korean asylum-seeker, and her new country accepted her. 

Settling down was not the easiest thing to do, even with the help of the South Korean government. Two countries that have been divided for so many years were different in all aspects. How does one feel about being Korean, where one Korea doesn’t exist?  She was confused and challenged. But nothing could cover the huge hole in her heart when she thought about her family. Hyeonseo was sending money from South Korea, but one time, it caused her family a lot of trouble. She knew she had to get them out of it, whatever the cost.

Speaking no Chinese, her family had a big risk of getting caught. Hyeonseo had to tell officers that they were deaf people, but it didn’t work all the time. Every time they got caught, Hyeonseo would pay a bribe and get them out, but money wasn’t infinite. When they were arrested once again, she had no money to pay the bribe, and it seemed that all these efforts were for nothing. But the universe didn’t let her lose all hope, and a stranger appeared. “Helping North Korean people,” he said and gave her the money. Soon, she was reunited with her family in Seoul. 

And then she finished the story of her book “The Girl With Seven Names,” and the audience stayed silent for a minute. The literature lovers in California indeed didn’t expect to learn the dark side of the other side of the world that night. Indeed, not all the heroes wear capes: a young lady with a gut to flee the cruel dictatorship dared to face all the consequences of her choice.

Fleeing the scariest dictatorship in the world, settling in a new place, starting from scratch with a little money – it takes courage, but what does it take you to tell your story to the world as Hyeonseo did? Her TED talk speech has been viewed by more than 15 million people, her book has become a global bestseller, she’s given speeches at the top universities around the world, and it would have never been possible if it wasn’t for her courage and strong will. Some are born in horrible living conditions, other people have no parents, different circumstances seem to be dictating the life we are living, but we often forget that we are the ones capable of changing the course of our life.

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It’s our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting.

Ellen DeGeneres

Ellen DeGeneres IS incredibly interesting. The comedian, author, actress and activist broke into the “men’s club” of comedy and shattered societal views of the LBGTQ community. 40 years into her career, DeGeneres continues to conquer obstacles.

Comedy Career

Born in 1958 and raised in Louisiana, DeGeneres practiced and grew her comedy routine in New Orleans’ comedy clubs. After touring nationally, she gained the attention of the Showtime Network. She was named “Funniest Person of 1984” and began touring for Showtime and headlining shows.

The Wall Street Journal reported that DeGeneres had difficulties connecting to her early audiences while touring. She struggled to convince them to appreciate her craft and acknowledge her unique talent. “Everyone has a sense of humor. “People misinterpret that to mean, ‘I’m a comedian.'”

After only four years of performing comedy, DeGeneres landed the gig of a lifetime; a performance on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson in 1986. She became the first female comic invited to sit on Carson’s couch to speak with him after performing.

DeGeneres’ legendary Tonight Show skit, “Phone Call to God”, was inspired by the death of her live-in girlfriend. After the death, she was forced to find a new place to live and sleep on a mattress infested with fleas. As she was not yet performing comedy, DeGeneres took to poetry as an outlet. “Why is this beautiful 21-year-old girl just gone and fleas are here?’’ Her pain was channeled into comedy gold.

Coming Out

In the fall of 1995, DeGeneres launched her prime-time sitcom, Ellen, in which she starred as the title character. History.com recalls that on April 30, 1997, character Ellen Morgan announced she was gay. Ellen was the first prime-time sitcom to feature an openly gay leading character. An estimated 42 million viewers watched the ground-breaking episode.

Just two weeks prior, DeGeneres adorned the cover of Time magazine saying “Yep, I’m gay.” Her decision opened the way for the LGBT community in Hollywood, although she had reservations at the time. “I am not fearless. I didn’t do it because I am fearless. I did it in spite of the fact that I was scared to death.”

Ellen was canceled the next season due to low ratings.

In an odd twist of fate, DeGeneres won an Emmy in 1997 as a writer for Ellen.

Years later, DeGeneres reflected on the experience with Dax Shepard on his podcast, Armchair Expert.   “It hurt my feelings. I was getting jokes made at my expense on every late-night show, people were making fun of me. I was really depressed. I had no agent, no possibility of a job, I had nothing.”

Depression is no laughing matter for DeGeneres. As a result of receiving death threats and public outcry, DeGeneres left LA and began seeing a therapist.  For nearly three years, DeGeneres isolated herself and received no work. Feeling out of control, she decided to pursue the only thing she did have control over – comedy.

Talk Show

Taking back her life and career, DeGeneres went on a 38-city comedy tour in 2000. Her slow and deliberate immersion back into Hollywood was rewarded with the honor of hosting the 53rd Primetime Emmy Awards in 2001.

Perseverance paid off for DeGeneres; one step at a time. With the May 2003 release of Disney’s Finding Nemo, DeGeneres’ voice became a fixture in households. Fans fell in love with her endearing, albeit forgetful, character “Dory.”

DeGeneres switched gears and at the age of 45 began hosting a syndicated talk show, The Ellen DeGeneres Show. The show was an instant hit after its 2003 launch. The show was nominated for numerous awards at the 31st Daytime Emmy’s. The Ellen DeGeneres Show, after only a single year, walked away with four Emmy’s, most significantly, Outstanding Talk Show host.  The show is the reigning winner for Outstanding Entertainment Talk Show. The theme of The Ellen DeGeneres Show is upbeat and inspiring. DeGeneres, on-air and off, offers inspiring words for anyone else that may be suffering.

Just hold on and know that something good will come from it, and there’s always a lesson in everything.

DeGeneres’ career has been a success because she is funny, of course, but mainly due to the fact that she followed her own path and looked for the lesson in every tough moment. “Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path, then, by all means, follow that path.” She could have taken the “easy” path but decided to speak her truth and encourage others to do the same.

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Honorary Doctorate in Humane Letters.
Author.
Actor.
Star in a Broadway show.
Entrepreneur.

These glowing titles all belong to one man, one man who has overcome poverty, bankruptcy and the loss of a child, a man labeled as “champion” for his boxing record. Mike Tyson is champion out of the ring too. 

Tyson’s life is full of lessons, lessons on avoiding trouble and experiences on being better and starting over.

The Early Years

Hardship is an understatement when describing Mike Tyson’s youth. Born in Brooklyn, NY, and raised by a single mother, Tyson turned to the street. By the age of 13, he had been arrested 38 times. In a 2014 interview with The Hamilton Spectator, Tyson credits the intervention of the legal system by introducing him to boxing. 

If they hadn’t sent me to a boys’ home where they found out I could box, I’d probably be dead right now.

Consequently, Tyson was introduced to boxing trainer Cus D’Amato. When Tyson was just 16 years old, his mother passed away. D’Amato became his legal guardian, mentor and friend. The two worked together until D’Amato’s passing in 1985.

In his 2013 autobiography “Undisputed Truth,” Tyson thanked D’Amato for his presence and influence. “Because of you, my life has reached heights I could never have imagined. Without you, I don’t know where I would be today. My gratitude to you is immeasurable.”

 

The Boxing Years

Tyson won his first heavyweight title in 1986 at the age of 20. He quickly became the “undisputed champion” by claiming wins at the same time in all three major boxing groups:  World Boxing Association, International Boxing Federation and World Boxing Council.

Nonetheless, Tyson’s personal life was in turmoil. In an interview with Barbara Walters, wife Robin Givens was less than flattering to Tyson.  “It’s been torture. It’s been pure hell. It’s been worse than anything I could imagine.” In his book, Tyson described the moment as the “ultimate betrayal.” The marriage ended in a bitter divorce.

After a 1992 rape conviction, Tyson served almost three years in prison.

Immediately following prison, Tyson returned to boxing and regained his heavyweight belts. His most infamous fight was his second match against Evander Holyfield in 1997. At the end of the third round, Tyson was disqualified for biting off a chunk of Holyfield’s ear. ESPN reported that an employee of the arena located the missing piece of ear later in the evening. Tyson was fined $3 million and temporarily banned from boxing. Initially, Tyson took no responsibility for the incident. “Holyfield is not a tough warrior, he got a little cut on his ear, and he quit.” Tyson later apologized.

Over 20 years later, Holyfield was a guest on Tyson’s podcast, Hotboxin’. Tyson shared on Instagram, “I can’t say enough good things about @evanderholyfield.”

Legal troubles and mayhem marred the remainder of Tyson’s boxing career. Tyson was imprisoned for assault. Fights were canceled because Tyson was unable to obtain travel visas due to his felony conviction. Boxing commissions refused to sanction fights while he was facing new charges of sexual assault. 

When recalling his ferocious boxing style with The Hamilton Spectator, Tyson acknowledged that he was not a good person.

I was nothing but a 100 percent fighter. I was savage; I didn’t know how to have a good time. I was crazy. There was egomania pouring out of me. I was the baddest ass man on earth, and all I knew how to do were bad things.

Tyson earned hundreds of millions during his boxing career. Sadly, in 2003 he filed Chapter 11 bankruptcy, primarily due to overspending. Documents gathered by The Smoking Gun revealed that Tyson owed over $13M in taxes.

At the age of 38, Tyson retired from boxing in 2005.

Years later, during an interview with Richard Ouzounian, Tyson reflected on his path to obtain fame. “I was so desperate to succeed; I would have sold my soul to the devil if that was possible.”

 

The Undisputed Years

Tyson did not retire from boxing and fade into the sunset. After years of reflection, he shared his truth.

In 2012, Mike Tyson took his one-person monologue show to Broadway. “Mike Tyson: The Undisputed Truth” was written by his third wife, Kiki.  Academy Award nominee Spike Lee directed his Broadway debut, and also directed the HBO Film special of the same name. The two-week Broadway run grossed over a million dollars. 

A book of the same name was released in 2013. “Undisputed Truth” has been described as “raw, powerful, and disturbing—a head-spinning take on Mr. Tyson’s life.” Tyson is personal and reflective in his autobiography; he shared details of the 2009 death of his daughter, Exodus. During a press release interview for the book, he discussed his decision to share this painful point in his life.  “I have no idea what other parents feel. I have no exclusivity to pain. So many other parents lost children. You gotta live life on life’s time.”

Tyson bared his soul to readers and offered advice for others who may be struggling. He shared his new path to success with Joe Money of The Source.

I try to stay on that path of humbleness.

 

The Better Years

In his forties, Tyson rebranded himself. He started a new career as a cameo actor and became a successful entrepreneur, proving that it is never too late to start over.

Tyson’s second biography, “Iron Ambition: My Life with Cus D’Amato,” was released in 2017. The book shares an affirmation promoted by D’Amato that is benefiting Tyson. “Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. “

Tyson admitted to GQ that he has struggled with addiction. “I always had my cocaine, my alcoholism, …and my sex addiction.” He credits cannabis by opening his eyes and providing a new path. “It’s almost like you die and you’re reborn.”

With partner Jim Jones, Tyson started Tyson Ranch in 2016. A division of The Ranch Companies, Tyson Ranch, specializes in cannabis production and distribution. The Daily Mail reported that Tyson revealed, in his podcast Hotboxin’, that Tyson Ranch sells around $500,000 of cannabis each month.

Money Inc states that Tyson’s current net worth is $3 million, a far cry from his bankruptcy almost twenty years ago.

Mike Tyson, like many people, struggled throughout his youth. He lost his mentor and his way. After hitting rock bottom, a few different times, Tyson rose and discovered his voice. He established projects that sparked joy. He is living his life to the fullest.

The next few years have the potential to be documented as his greatest accomplishment. Tyson is “getting better and better” every day.

What are you doing to be “better and better” every day?

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What it's like to be jennifer lopez

No one becomes a Hollywood celebrity overnight. A lot of people think that stars are born with a silver spoon in a mouth and just get lucky to be where they are. We see a beautiful picture but no history behind that.

Undoubtedly, you have heard about Jennifer Lopez. Whether you like her or not, no one can’t fight the fact that she is one of the most powerful celebrities in the world.  She is an actress, a singer, a dancer, a fashion designer, a producer and a businesswoman. Jennifer is considered to be the highest-paid Latin actress in Hollywood. But her career has not come as a gift, and she was putting her back into that. Her journey of success was uphill, and the going was rough. But look where she is now!

How this all started

Young Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez was born to Puerto Rican parents in the Bronx. She lived in a small apartment with her parents and two other sisters. As a very active kid, little Jennifer began taking dancing and singing lessons at the age of 5.

Therefore, once she graduated and intended to work on her acting career, her parents protested that choice. That was the moment Jennifer knew that there’s no way back, and she will do everything that it needs to make her dreams come true. She rebelled, she worked hard, she succeeded. It sounds like a perfect formula for success, but that’s not only that.

 

Imagine a young talented girl with a huge desire to become a dancer, a star fighting every single day the resentment of her parents, poor life, all the difficulties real life presents. She didn’t mind sleeping on the couch at her dance studio, eating one slice of pizza as a meal for the day, countless arguments with her parents. And on that battlefield, she was fighting alone against the world. Such a struggle is by its very nature inspirational and worth the blood, sweat, and tears. In consequence, the results were not long in coming.

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Now she’s not just a music star who has sold some 80 million records worldwide, not just an actress of many beloved movies, including The Wedding Planner and Selena, which earned her a Golden Globe nomination for her breakout role.  Nevertheless, she is also a woman whose inner power, self-sacrifice inspired millions of people to chase their dreams and never stop believing in themselves.

 

Taking a look back, Jennifer Lopez draws some conclusions from her past:

“I don’t regret what I’ve been through. I’ve had ups and downs, super highs and some really low lows. I’ve been so blessed that I could never say, I wish this didn’t happen. It’s part of who I am.”

 

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Final Thoughts

The truth is that Jennifer Lopez is a pure inspiration for everyone out there fighting every day for their dream even if every other person around says it’s pointless.

When you are feeling down or just have a lot of self-doubts, ask yourself:

  • What is the worst that can happen if I go after my dream?
  • Will I regret later in my life that I didn’t pursue my dream because I was too scared, unconfident or lazy?
  • How happy and proud will I be if I don’t give up?

Think about it and give yourself a try. And remember: “Everybody is genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

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You paint a picture in your head and perfect this creation day after day. You live in this little world that you’ve created, and it turns out to be the purpose of your life that is completing your individuality. It’s your baby that you are cultivating and protecting. It’s your private territory that nobody has a right to enter. It’s you.

There is only one bigger fear for an artist than opening up and sharing her or his creation with the world – is waiting for the people’s opinions. The time between showing her paintings to the public and receiving its feedback seemed to last forever to her. “I remember how my heart rate [has] increased!” she recalled. “What if they don’t like it?

Oxana Makarova, “Russian native living in Chicago,” is one of those artists that used to hide her art pieces from the public. Well, at least till one day. The day that changed her life forever.

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After finishing art school, the young girl decided to move to America in search of a new life that would fit her needs. And what she really needed is something meaningful. “…I chose to come to the United States to expand my understanding of the world: I had to get lost first to find myself next.

After moving from state to state, she ended up in Chicago along with Andi Lewis, her roommate, that has become a vital person in her life path. She kept watching Oxana painting in her room month after month until one day she asked why she is not doing it for a living? “For a living?” Oxana thought. “Who in the world would care about my paintings?

Andi made her create a Facebook account, upload all her works and invited people to like it.

That was a moment when a new artist has been discovered. The artist that did not even suspect that it was a lifechanging day bringing a new future, the hope and sense of life.

Oxana had never been so nervous than the day she waited on social media’s reaction. But the feeling when she opened her Facebook profile again and found 200 likes she will never forget. In a blink of an eye, she receives her first official portrait order. It’s the mixed feelings of fear and happiness: what she does matters.

And just like that, a person standing next to you randomly changes your life by believing in you and supporting you. 

Today, Oxana Makarova is a famous artist in Chicago that takes online orders locally and nationally. Looking back, she now sees how important it is sometimes to go through different chapters of your life in order to find what you are looking for. But most importantly is to find out what is it that you are looking for.

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Oil is my favorite medium and that’s what I use the most. I love to paint portraits. Something I enjoy most about my creative process is when I take a step back to undress my subject: peeling back their truth one layer at a time to discover what makes them unique and important to this world.

Often, people don’t understand how difficult it is to penetrate the protective layer that covers one’s soul, but it is one of my most exhilaration accomplishments. 

My purpose is to expose life’s pure truth and beauty.”

When it comes to making a portrait order at Oxana’s, one should remember that it’s not a typical business service all are used to, but a creative service that requires inspiration. “Sometimes when clients describe what they want, I start seeing ideas in my head through different images and combine them into one piece right away. And I just know in my mind that “I got it.” Sometimes I need to think about it and surely Muse always comes to me in the least expected moment. Then I need to rush, grab a piece of paper and draw it. Music and different projects help tremendously as well. Often I experience synesthesia when I just see the music and get ideas for the project. I trust the process of creation. It is not always easy, but I make sure I complete the work on time.

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Redioxy Art

Oxana Makarova got lucky to happen to be at the right place, at the right moment and with the right person that made her believe in herself and randomly changed her life. But what if you are one of those artists that hides a talent too? 

 “It is very common that people do what they were told to do.  They take the logical route and don’t always follow their hearts or passions because of self-doubt, lack of courage and support. My message to them is that you are not alone in this journey! Get help from experienced people with knowledge. When you think you know everything, consider that you’ve already lost. My friend once said, ‘You should always be learning. If you are the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room.’ So get support from family and friends who will motivate and inspire you. It’s important to hear that so you can continue pursuing your dream,” Oxana said.

“Decide. Commit. Succeed. Repeat. That is my formula for success.”

 

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